Smashed it

I believe I may have written about smashed burgers a couple of times and that:

  1. It’s the only way to make home-made burgers for me

  2. That I may never again order fancy burgers when we eat out with the exception of McDonald’s.

  3. The only bun to serve it on is brioche (this is non-negotiable).

But I’m writing about it again because I’ve managed to make it in less than twenty minutes (including prep time) with the least mess possible. I guess, familiarity creates a perfect system.

The trick is, to start cooking your beef the moment you press the on-button on your air-fryer for your fries.

It takes about 15 minutes for the fries to cook and in that space of time, you smash/fry your patties on the skillet; put the cheese slices on top; and then onto the oven at 180 to finish cooking, and then a resting period as the fries finish cooking.

I always weigh my beef, and a 60+ gram patty within this time frame ends up being medium-rare which is how I like my beef.

The small bun can be misleading; I’ve attempted to eat two and it ended being two much.

The weekend

Funny thing is, mac and cheese isn’t one of those dishes I would personally pick.

I think it’s a dish that personifies the excessiveness and wanton disregard for health of most American comfort foods. Sure, if it’s on the table I’ll have a couple of spoonfuls.

And yet I make it every so often (coz it’s such a crowd-pleaser), and everyone loves it to the point that I actually get requests to make it personally for get-togethers and parties. The recipe that I’ve been using is not anything special. I think I simply Googled, ‘best mac and cheese recipe’ and used the first one that came up that didn’t look complicated or excessive (truffle, barf).

But the trick to good food is simply making it well, and for pasta dishes, the same fundamental rules apply: salt your pasta water generously and don’t overcook your pasta. I also learned that having at least three different kinds of cheese creates a more dimensional flavour.

I also layer the pasta the same way I would do lasagna. For the quantity of 650 grams of elbow macaroni for a 15 inch x 7 inch pan, I did three layers, including the crumbed-parmesan and smoked paprika topping.

I made this for my friend Jordan’s uncle who had his birthday this weekend.

The work weekend

WHY ARE IPHONE PHOTOS SO SHIT??????

Friday at the Auckland Night Markets

We’ve been going to the markets for years and we’ve seen how it’s become a barometer of changing tastes and food trends. New Zealand is a bit behind I must admit, but who cares? I’ve calmed down now and realised that food is just food.

We’ve seen the current It food come and go. When it came out, there were always queues for churros and now, we look with sympathy at the Indian dude stuck with a franchise with practically no buyers (I looked furtively and his deep-fryers hadn’t even been used and it was already 7pm). From a business perspective, this kind of customer desertion can be brutal.

Asians on the other hand have always been more adept at pivoting to another product. We remember the dumpling wave (wasn’t really obsessed with it) when every other stand was hawking them at ridiculously cheap prices. And now, there was only one or two selling them. On their commercial gill plates, there were various meats for the now-popular food combos that promised more food for your buck.

Islander food- pork roasted on a spit, hefty cubes of taro, rice sticky with coconut cream - has also seen a resurgence for the heartier eater.

The same thing for desserts- the still trendy Korean waffles with sweet bean paste, American-styled cheesecakes, pecan tarts, baked Alaska and cookies as big as your face featuring the now ubiquitous Biscoff biscuit.

A couple of years ago, I would spend $40 which seemed a lot (I liked variety). Now, you’ll easily go past that if you weren’t careful now that most of the vendors have EFTPOS machines.

Tested and Approved:
Trendy Tanghulu; various fruits encased in sugar similar to candy-apples. Surprisingly refreshing with just enough sugar to complement the fruit’s sour notes. Careful in eating them though- the sugar crystals can be sharp enough to nick the inside of your mouth.

Korean puff pastries; the woman selling them filled the pastries with cream and torched the sugared top ala Creme Brulee.

Still a NO
Filipino food includes the usual suspects like dinuguan, pork laing, adobo, etc. The problem is that I can cook these better in my own house. The only thing I like is pork barbecue, and no one else does it better than Pinoys. The trick? You need to put some fat in your BBQ.

The Viral Dubai chocolate; they were selling portions of it and even if I’ve never really been a chocolate fan, I just needed to taste what the fuss was all about. And this is what it’s like- imagine eating a ton of pistachios and barfing it out, before using it as a chocolate filling. Gross.

Weekend desserts

I’ve made this once before and I wasn’t exactly thrilled. I thought it was dull and stodgy.

But the 2nd time’s the charm and I think it’s the recipe (a different one) and it’s also because I’ve used a stand-mixer for this one- you do a lot of mixing which a hand-whisk wouldn't be able to do as well.

The recipe called for a lot of creamy things and this is what you get in the end, a truly rich, ultra-creamy cake that straddles the fine line between a too-sweet and a too cheesy (savoury) concoction.

And to pair it with something that has alcohol makes it a little bit more adult, more refined.

Almusal (breakfast)

I’m putting the sad, sludgy and gray overnight oats on the side for a while for something a bit more substantial.

I wish I had jumbo Pinoy hotdogs instead, but these are (pork) Kabbanos sausages made locally, and they would have to do. They take a while to cook through so take your time to grill them over low heat until all the little cuts you’ve made on them all bloom out like petals.

Our current spice obsession is ras el hanout which has found its way into our air-fryer chips and now, fried garlic rice. Sunny-side-up eggs are covered with our other favourite seasoning, More Than Just a Bagel Seasoning.

At the UP, this was my favourite go-to meal at Rodics who I think, invented the entire SiLog portmanteau. I didn’t care much for their signature TapSiLog because I felt that the salty, tangy beef bits demanded more rice, and the single-cup serving was never always enough. And it was never a thing back in the day to order an extra serving.

But the hotdog and rice combo was just right, and even if I can have extra rice, I won’t.

Gochujang Spam

I saw this on Insta where it was described as ‘elevating Spam’. I loathe the word ‘elevating’. Pretty much the only things that elevated somethings manage to elevate are your expectations and 9 out of 10, it comes crashing down anyway. If it’s beneath you to eat anything out of a can, then fuck you lol.

When I bring Spam to work for lunch, I get a lot of comments but not because Kiwis are precious or anything; processed meats haven’t really been part of the gastronomic landscape.

But this recipe really works when generally, stuff from social media are not properly kitchen tested, or worse, fake.

Chicken Inasal Wednesdays

It’s officially autumn, but you still get extra hours of daylight up til 8pm which gives you the illusion that 5pm has stretched itself to three hours. So we went to the gym a bit late and getting home, I realised that I had half a chicken steeping in a marinade that would take at least 45 minutes to cook. But it was all I had - or a can of corned beef that I had been saving.

It was supposed to be chicken nasal - the marinade I made, plucked randomly from the internet called for vinegar, lemon grass (I used a powder), lemon, real-sugar sprite, brown sugar, patis, salt and pepper. Then there was a basting of atsuete powder and melted butter.

My only memory of chicken inasal was of course Mang Inasal, and my version - dumped into the air fryer for faster cooking - tasted nothing remotely of that memory. Maybe it should have been grilled over charcoal; maybe it needed real tanglad (lemon grass). Maybe it needed more acidity.

But I didn’t really care. The chicken was tender, the skin crisp and caramelised and the butter-annatto sauce dosed up with chicken salt was perfect with rice.

Stuff I ate over the weekend

Buns
We heard on the news that this cafe in our area is closing down because of some housing issue (they’re leasing a space in a historic, council-owned building), but what caught our attention was that they allegedly sell Auckland’s best cinnamon buns.

So of course, I bought some for pick-up the next day because it would be a shame that we’re in the vicinity of a much-praised food item and we haven’t even tried it (FOMO much). We’ve never been to the cafe because we’ve never been cafe-going people unless there was a special occasion, or we were in the grip of craving for chicken and chips at the one, not-so-fancy cafe that we do go to, Hollywood Cafe. And we also hate having to share cafe space (not really spacious) with animals and caterwauling kids, so…

The place was packed- I guess people heard the news so they probably came to see what the fuss was all about. The staff were full-on and there were two queues in opposite directions, leading to the tiny space where you placed your orders.

So it was a good decision to just pick up the buns which we had to wait for just five minutes. I had no idea of how big they were and thought that $48 for six was a standard price. But they were huge and had a loose free-form shape that didn’t look like the compact scrolls we’re familiar with (eg. Cinnabon’s).

But were they Auckland’s best? (I’ve honestly hadn’t had anything else from Auckland anyway). Probably Top 5; my sister’s version is better.

But to be fair, it all comes down to preference really. They were a tad too sweet for me; the glaze I initially thought, was condensed milk (why??). The next day I realised that it was actually cream cheese that probably had (a lot of) sugar added. And strangely, they weren’t cinnamony enough- you didn’t even get that whiff of cinnamon even if they were handed to us still quite warm. But I know some people who would adore all of its gooey, one-note sweetness.

Chicharon
I made binagoongang baboy and I took off the skin to make into chicharon- you don’t waste it when you have it! I realised later that I actually didn’t know how to make it into chicharon. Jong makes a big batch of it in their unpredictable oven but I haven’t gotten to asking how he makes it. I ended up cooking it three ways- frying it first (didn’t quite work not to mention the mess of exploding oil); then dumping it into the air-fryer, before I decided to put it finally in the oven on a baking rack, at low temp for about an hour. It didn’t have a lot of fat, and I ended up with something like a measly 200 grams. But look, it’s a luxury and an indulgence- you don’t need a lot of chicharon in your life.

Sunday steak and fries
I don’t eat a lot of red meat, but when I do, I get something nice like Wagyu. I’ve also perfected the method to cook it which isn’t complicated- fry each side for up to 5 minutes (this is for a 250-gram piece) for medium- rare and let rest for 10 minutes. I did a simple soy and butter gravy, made some skinny fries in the air fryer, and as a veggie side, had crisp, peppery water-cress which I just flash fried in butter and olive-oil (Sam had the beans). Done.

What I ate (over the long weekend)

  1. All Indian restaurants in Auckland seem to use the same recipe for their dishes which doesn’t really matter because 99% of the time, it’s good. It’s the kind of goodness that’s impossible to replicate. And don’t bother with pre-made mixes or sauces; they never come close to the real thing. And because the dishes seem identical wherever you buy them, I don’t quite remember where we get our favourite curries - mine is ALWAYS a lamb madras - except that it’s local. This is the one time I go all out on carbs - basmati rice and three garlic naan - because the sauce is so rich, that one serving (at less than $20 for the whole combo), lasts me THREE meals. People always joke about Filipinos eating a whole pot or rice with one cup of gravy and well it’s true. Very satisfying.

  2. There’s a Malaysian restaurant that serves crispy chicken skin, but theirs is battered which in my mind, probably doubles up the fat content. Occasionally, I save the skin from my chicken and cook them in one go, but in the oven at a low temp until they’re completely rendered. I just season it with sea salt and pepper; dipping sauce is Pinakurat vinegar.

  3. Moustache cookies.

  4. For Sam’s birthday dinner, we went to the most basic French restaurant there is Le Garde-Manger. But basic probably works because it has outlasted every other fancy French resto since opening in 2010. It probably defies trends, but the menu has changed very little; the same old classics are there with occasional specials written on the board. While not French, I ordered the fish special which was a perfectly cooked piece of snapper fillet. The accompanying side of ratatouille was so good, that I replicated it the next day. Just don’t make the mistake of having them make a cake (which turned out to be a tiny, dry forgettable chocolate cake) and order their desert crepes instead.

  5. For Sam’s birthday cake, we decided to make Ina Garten’s (in)famous Mocha Icebox cake.

Biscoff saves the day

The double-cream split and the ube jam didn’t really taste at all like ube, but Biscoff single-handedly redeemed everything!

Frankly, we’ve never heard of Biscoff until it was all over social-media, appearing everywhere from cookies, pies to ice-cream. It has that distinctness that’s similar to Amaretti biscuits; the flavour doesn’t get lost when you use it as an ingredient in something.

I made banoffee pie for Mary’s birthday and I attempted to do some variations to elevate it a bit more; putting the caramel on top of the bananas instead of underneath them, and then piping the cream topping in structured swirls. The cut bananas turn brown so putting the caramel on top ensures that they keep their colour. But using canned caramel means softening it you see and this is where it failed- the sauce was too runny and it ran down the sides (should’ve microwaved it instead of diluting it with cream).

The second disaster was the cream topping. I used double cream for the 1st time and didn’t realise that you had to watch it like a hawk in the mixer. Whisking it too long and it could become butter - which I wouldn’t have minded- but it didn’t, yet it inexplicably split (which made piping pointless).

Note 1: try making it in a smaller springform pan (which is so GODDAMNED hard to find) to give it better height.

But the Biscoff base was SPECTACULAR. It was like having a deliciously crisp and buttery cookie at the bottom. It didn’t really matter if everything else looked like a hot mess - the pie though as a whole was satisfyingly rich without being cloyingly sweet. Note 2: a Biscoff base is more delicate than one made from Graham crackers or digestives. For an eight-inch round pan, you can use two packets or about 500 grams of biscuits for a stturdier base.

Two days after the Banoffee I realised that I had an open bar of cream cheese, some leftover long life cream and one final packet of Biscoff, so I thought, why not an ube cheesecake as I also had a jar of ube in the pantry?

Making a cheesecake is easy enough - could make it with my eyes closed - but the Youtube videos were right in recommending that you not only use purple food colouring, but also ube extract. The ‘ube’ cheescake neither looked nor tasted like ube - but the nearly 2-inch Biscoff base again saved the day!

Sunday

We finally took down the Christmas trees, took the mattress that Dylan slept on when he was here back to the garage, re-arranged the plants and cleaned up my desk. The holidays are officially over.

It’s too hot to work from home (we don’t have AC) even if the second floor has plenty of windows and two sliding doors that open to the deck- but what is 26 degrees compared to a summer’s day in Pangasinan or maybe Dubai??

And yet here I am, topless, sipping water every hour and feeling that heat lethargy where half of your brain feels like mush.

And yet I have fallen in love with summer, with sunshine. I read somewhere that a man needs vitamin D to boost testosterone; so maybe I had been feeling the ‘boost’. But I’m still wary of it. A decade ago, people I knew were laughing at my SPF 80 sunscreen but look who’s laughing now. The last three years, the sunscreening has expanded to include my neck and my hands.

They say there’s a hole in the ozone right over New Zealand, so even if a 31 degree day in the scheme of things isn’t really hot, we got it worse.

It’s a bitch to deep fry in the heat, but the easiest meat in the deep freeze to cook are boneless chicken thighs so fried-chicken it is. I have the recipe for ‘popcorn chicken’ down pat which is really all in the batter. I never used to have a measurement for it, hence, the inconsistency but now I do. The ratio of flour to tapioca starch (or cornstarch) should always be one to one with a teaspoon of baking powder. From there, I just make variations on the flavouring. I’ve always been partial to Chinese five-spice or plain salted- this is because I always eat it with rice and a buffalo-ranch style of coating doesn’t really suit.

We bought the viral KMart mini rice cooker and it’s perfect; I don’t eat any more than a cup of rice and it makes enough for dinner and for lunch the next day.

What did you eat in the final days of 2023?

There were plenty of things that I still didn’t get to make, buy or eat:

  1. Leche flan (make)

  2. Sans Rival (make)

  3. Caviar (buy)

  4. Cocktail recipes I’ve saved from TikTok (make)

  5. A cheese-board (make)

  6. Salmon Wellington (make)

  7. Mini beef wellington (make)

  8. Almond Roca (buy)

  9. Pavlova Christmas tree (make)

  10. Pecan tart (make)

Maybe this year…

Korean nights

New Year’s eve buffet lunch at the Cordis